When Mr. Ideas and I purchased our first bondage kit several months ago it came with a blindfold. Blindfolds are a fun and sexy way to spice up your sex life. If you are new to the concepts of BDSM this will be a great beginning exercise for you and your partner to try. If you don’t have a blindfold handy grab a necktie, scarf, or bandana. As long as the object you are using is comfortable and blocks out sight it will work.
So one of the questions you may be wondering is “Why use a blindfold?” When you cut off one of your senses the other four intensify. Most of us rely heavily on our sense of sight but when we lose that we become much more aware of what is really going on around us. Our sense of touch magnifies and what might have been a slight touch before can make us quiver when we didn’t see it coming. We hear the increased breathing, smell the scented candles burning and taste the lips of our lover all the more.
Without the sense of sight, the blindfolded partner is left to lie there anticipating their lover’s next move which makes it a great time to try out new things. Here is a small list of things to try on your partner while he/she is blindfolded:
- Move your hands (tongue, or feather) slowly over your lover’s body. Focus on areas you might normally not give much attention to when making love.
- Break out the ice. Move the ice slowly over your lover’s body as it melts. Not knowing this cold sensation is coming will definitely add to the element of surprise.
- Use a vibrator to massage over your partner’s body. Intensify speeds as you wish. This works great with a metal vibrator because of the smooth cool feeling.
- Try out a new toy your partner may enjoy but be a little nervous about. Now might be the perfect time to try out those nipple clamps or to lube up a butt plug or anal beads and try them out on your partner. (You can check out our guide to beginning anal play HERE.)
- Don’t forget to give your partner oral. A little ice or a menthol cough drop will add a little tingling and sensitivity as your senses are heightened. If your guy is the one blindfolded it might also be a good time to try The Grapefruit Blow Job.
- Feed your blindfolded lover some special treats like strawberries, grapes, or chocolate.
- Other items you might want to include: feathers, oils, wax, and massagers.
Blindfold play can add intimacy and trust to your relationship. The partner with the blindfold can’t see what is about to happen and has to fully trust that whatever his/her partner is about to do will be an arousing experience for the both of you. Blindfolding your partner puts you in a very dominate state. Your partner has entrusted you with their entire body and that is a lot of power.
However, as with all activities, communication is key. Talk to your partner about sex. Talk about things you would like to try and things you are definitely not okay with. If you are afraid your partner might do something you are uncomfortable with have a “safe word.” A safe word is a word that you set up with your partner and use in sexual situations where you would like them to stop or become less intense. Safe words are used commonly during role play when “No” might not necessarily mean “No.”
Also see: A is for Anal: Tips for Beginners