G is for G-Spot: How To Locate It


The G-spot, also called the Grafenburg spot after German gynecologist Ernst Grafenburg, is an erogenous area of the vagina that when stimulated can lead to powerful orgasms and potential female ejaculation (or squirting.)

The G-spot is so elusive that many women don’t even believe they have one. When British researchers asked 1800 women if they had a G-spot only 56% said they did. Though the G-spot has been a topic of debate for many years in the medical and scientific community it has now been proven in the Journal of Sexual Medicine that yes, every woman does possess this anatomical pleasure point.

The G-spot is often referred to as the female prostate because the tissue surrounding it has the same chemical make-up as the male prostate and in some cases can cause a female to ejaculate when stimulated. I personally have experienced a G-spot orgasm and it is unlike any other and was even more intense than a clitoris orgasm for me and I do in fact squirt when my G-spot is stimulated.

The main problem in having a G-spot orgasm for many women is figuring out where exactly the G-spot is. Locating the G-spot can take a little time and patience and be done alone or with the help of your partner but however you decide to venture on this journey here are some tips on how you can locate it:

Lie back, bend your knees and spread your legs, your vagina should now be open and accessible. With your palm facing up, place two fingers inside your vagina, placing the tips of your fingers against the center upper vaginal wall. “You’re seeking a spongy, puckered, or slightly ridged area, like the roof of your mouth,” explains Celeste Hirschman, assistant professor at the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality.

If you are having little success at first try relaxing more and becoming more aroused. If you are searching with a partner try some other forms of foreplay like kissing or stimulating your clitoris or nipples. When you are aroused the G-spot fills with fluid making it larger and easier to find. Since the G-spot is located so close to the urethra one sure sign you have located it is you may feel like you have a sudden need to pee. This will pass.

Good hunting and once you find your magic button try different pressures and stroking positions. There are many sex toys available for G-spot stimulation and don’t forget to try different angles and positions as well while having intercourse. Doggie-style and cowgirl are good positions for possible G-spot stimulation as is adding a few pillows under your butt so that the penis is entering and penetrating at an angle during missionary.






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C is for Condoms


For this post I will be referring to the male condom, you know that thin stretchy pouch a man puts on his penis before sexual intercourse to prevent pregnancy and STDs. I am not going to tell you how or why you should use a condom instead I am going to make a case for how condoms can, in fact, be sexy.

If you have ever used a condom during sexual penetration you can probably recall that “buzz-kill” moment where your both going hot and heavy then have to come to a halt so you or your partner can put on a condom. If you are the woman in this scenario I am going to suggest that you intervene. Instead of being an impatient spectator let your inner dominance come out to play. Take control of the situation (and penis) and put the condom on for him. You can sexily move down between his legs stroking his member while you roll the condom down over it or give him something to look at by climbing up on top like you are going to go reverse cowgirl and then putting on the condom. His view and the feel of what you are doing can be quite sexy.

Condom Anal Sex - Teenage Lesbians

If you are a little shy about putting the condom on your partner try doing it with a blindfold. In the middle of foreplay try blindfolding your partner and not letting him know what you are up to and placing the condom on his penis. (You will want to know beforehand where the condom is!) This will not only prevent you from being nervous if you are new and don’t like the idea of being watched but will add a sense of excitement as well. Hey, if you are feeling a bit adventurous why not try out some of the ideas I listed for blindfold play HERE. 

Here are a few more fun and sexy ideas for using condoms:

Try a condom like Trojan Ecstasy Fire and Ice that produces a warming and tingling sensation for both partners.

Durex Performance Intense offers a ribbed and dotted condom for her pleasure.

How about safe oral with a flavored condom? Glyde Organic Flavored condoms are vegan and feature 5 great tasting 100% organic fruit flavors: blueberry, vanilla, black licorice, strawberry, and wildberry.

I’m not sure how sexy this is but it sure does seem like it would be a fun and playful idea to try a glow in the dark condom like this one from Night Light at least once.

Check out more posts in the A to Z blog series:

A is for Anal: Tips for Beginners

B is for Blindfold: Ideas for Blindfold Play

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M is for Masturbation

In honor of Masturbation Monday, I have decided to skip ahead in my A to Z sex blog series and share with you the letter M.

Masturbation is simply sexual stimulating your own genitals for pleasure usually to the point of orgasm. There are many ways to masturbate, you can use your hands or fingers, everyday objects like the pulsating water from a showerhead or sex toys like a vibrator. There is so much that can be said about masturbation but in this post, I am going to address just two areas, the benefits of masturbation and masturbating with your partner.

Did you know that masturbation can be more than just fun that there are actual health benefits as well? I am going to share a few with you but be sure there are many more.

    1. Masturbation relieves stress for both men and women by releasing oxytocin, a hormone that makes you happier and helps with depression.
    2. Masturbating works as a natural sleep aid. Leading up to climax your body produces the hormone dopamine and afterward oxytocin along with endorphins which can help you fight insomnia naturally.
    3. Women who experience regular orgasm have a greater resistance to coronary heart disease and less chance of developing type 2 diabetes.
    4. Masturbation or orgasm can be a natural pain reliever. It also helps in relieving  cramps in women during their menstrual cycles.
    5. Masturbation helps flush out bacteria from the cervix in women and lowers chances of getting a urinary tract infection.
    6. Regular ejaculation in men causes sperm to be more healthy. Research has shown that the sperm quality and quantity increases the more a man ejaculates.
    7. Men who ejaculate more than 5 times a week are 1/3  less likely to have prostate cancer because it flushes the toxins out of the urogenital tract.
    8. Regular ejaculation in men helps prevent erectile dysfunction.

When most people hear the word masturbation they usually think of it as a solo activity. Masturbating was something you did to get yourself off before you met your partner but what if I told you that masturbating with your partner could also be a great way to spice up your sex life and find out more about each other. At first, you might feel a little vulnerable sharing such an intimate act with your partner. You might worry about what you look like, the faces you make while touching yourself or the moans that might slip through your lips but trust me once you relax you might find the experience to be quite sexy. In fact one of the things I am most turned on by is watching my husband pleasure himself and seeing him shoot his load.

By watching your partner touch himself/herself you do more than get an erotic show you can see how your partner likes to be touched and what turns them on. How does your partner stroke himself? Does he rub his testicles or run his fingers over his nipples as he touches himself? Does she prefer rubbing her clit or sliding her fingers or a toy inside herself when she masturbates? This is where you should be paying attention and learning how best you can please your partner in the future. By sharing this intimate moment with each other you and your partner increase your trust with one another and are one step closer to having a more happy and fulfilling sex life.



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B is for Blindfold: Ideas for Blindfold Play

When Mr. Ideas and I purchased our first bondage kit several months ago it came with a blindfold. Blindfolds are a fun and sexy way to spice up your sex life. If you are new to the concepts of BDSM this will be a great beginning exercise for you and your partner to try. If you don’t have a blindfold handy grab a necktie, scarf, or bandana. As long as the object you are using is comfortable and blocks out sight it will work.

So one of the questions you may be wondering is “Why use a blindfold?” When you cut off one of your senses the other four intensify. Most of us rely heavily on our sense of sight but when we lose that we become much more aware of what is really going on around us. Our sense of touch magnifies and what might have been a slight touch before can make us quiver when we didn’t see it coming. We hear the increased breathing, smell the scented candles burning and taste the lips of our lover all the more.

Without the sense of sight, the blindfolded partner is left to lie there anticipating their lover’s next move which makes it a great time to try out new things. Here is a small list of things to try on your partner while he/she is blindfolded:

  1.  Move your hands (tongue, or feather) slowly over your lover’s body. Focus on areas you might normally not give much attention to when making love.
  2. Break out the ice. Move the ice slowly over your lover’s body as it melts. Not knowing this cold sensation is coming will definitely add to the element of surprise.
  3. Use a vibrator to massage over your partner’s body. Intensify speeds as you wish. This works great with a metal vibrator because of the smooth cool feeling.
  4. Try out a new toy your partner may enjoy but be a little nervous about. Now might be the perfect time to try out those nipple clamps or to lube up a butt plug or anal beads and try them out on your partner. (You can check out our guide to beginning anal play HERE.)
  5. Don’t forget to give your partner oral. A little ice or a menthol cough drop will add a little tingling and sensitivity as your senses are heightened. If your guy is the one blindfolded it might also be a good time to try The Grapefruit Blow Job. 
  6. Feed your blindfolded lover some special treats like strawberries, grapes, or chocolate.
  7. Other items you might want to include: feathers, oils, wax, and massagers.

Blindfold play can add intimacy and trust to your relationship. The partner with the blindfold can’t see what is about to happen and has to fully trust that whatever his/her partner is about to do will be an arousing experience for the both of you.  Blindfolding your partner puts you in a very dominate state. Your partner has entrusted you with their entire body and that is a lot of power.

However, as with all activities, communication is key. Talk to your partner about sex. Talk about things you would like to try and things you are definitely not okay with. If you are afraid your partner might do something you are uncomfortable with have a “safe word.” A safe word is a word that you set up with your partner and use in sexual situations where you would like them to stop or become less intense. Safe words are used commonly during role play when “No” might not necessarily mean “No.”


Also see: A is for Anal: Tips for Beginners

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A is for Anal: Tips for Beginners

This is the first installment of my A to Z sex blog series where I work my way through the alphabet, touching on a new sexual topic that may be of interest to couples with each new letter. My hope is to finish all 26 letters by the end of September. So without further ado….A is for Anal.

Many couples are curious about anal play and sex and for good reason, the anal area can be an erogenous zone for many. I personally love anal sex but my first experience was a horrible one. My partner and I did not know what we were doing. I was young and nervous and had never read anything about anal sex. He had watched just enough porn videos to be dangerous and broke all of the rules, he went in fast, we didn’t use lube (a definite no-no, especially for beginners!), and worst of all he did not listen to me when I communicated with him that it was painful. Partners should always listen to one another and if one partner is not enjoying the experience it should be halted immediately and anal sex should never be painful.

Here are some of the best anal sex tips for beginners:

1. Use lots of lube.

While the vagina is naturally lubricated the anus is not. A good water-based lube will be your best friend when it comes to anal play even if you decide not to penetrate. The tissue in the anus is more sensitive than the vagina and you want to avoid this being an uncomfortable experience.


2. Go slow and relax.

Items similar to Slow Slow Parking Sign - Wall Decal on Etsy

Slow is going to be key to the enjoyment of anal sex. Make sure your partner is relaxed and ready to receive. Start with some foreplay, stimulate the area with a finger or tongue. Insert lube fingers or a small toy designed for the area like a butt plug before trying out his member. When and if you are ready for penetration make sure your partner puts his penis in slowly. If you are nervous try rubbing your clit and focus on how good that feels during the insertion process.

3.  Communicate with your partner.

Using your words and listening to your partner will ensure you both have an enjoyable experience. Be honest with your partner about how you are feeling or if you feel you need a break or to change something. Be receptive to your partner’s suggestions and in tune with their needs so you both have a “happy ending.”


A quick word of caution for those new to anal play. Wash any toys, fingers, or your penis (or change condoms) before inserting them into the vaginal area. Bacteria found in the anus can lead to a vaginal or urinary tract infection if it finds its way into the vagina.

I hope my sharing of my first experience and these tips have not scared you away from anal play. My intentions were to offer some advice so that it would be a more enjoyable experience for both you and your partner. Fast forward almost two decades and a husband who listens to my needs and I have found anal sex to be quite an orgasmic experience.


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Naughty Candy Surprises

The next time you are in the grocery store stop by the candy aisle and pick up these two delicious treats that you can use in naughty ways later.

  1.  The Candy Necklace

Remember wearing these tasty and accessories as a little girl? Maybe your taste in necklaces has matured but have you ever thought of wearing one of these as an edible garter? I recently ran across this idea on Cosmo and can’t wait to try it with my husband. Slide one of these on under your favorite skirt or dress and tempt him with it while you are out and enjoy having him nibble it off of you later!

2.  Candy Buttons 

Peel off the buttons, lick the back and stick them to all of the places on your body you would like a little extra attention! Once your partner has eaten off all of your buttons reward him/her with a few of their own.


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What is Role Play?

Role playing is changing one’s behavior to assume a given or assumed role. When you add it to your bedroom foreplay, a word which here means fooling around pre-sex, then it can be an entertaining and arousing addition. Role playing can and has reinvigorated love lives, while at the same time ones that don’t need revived are kept fun and lively.

As with any role there are several different methods and/or types of role playing that really just depend on the people involved whether or not they will work for the intended purpose. If you are interested in getting started in role playing in the bedroom you can check out these ->Fucking Ideas<- and start your foreplay off like a professional. If you like, it is encouraged to get a few costumes and items to play the part such as a feather duster or stethoscope.

The gallery for --> Stethoscope Heart Tattoos

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25+ Role Playing Ideas for Beginners

Whether you are just starting out on your role playing journey or have became quite the expert here are a few role playing ideas to help spice up your sex life:

  1. Massage Therapist works on the tense patient and offers a little something “extra”. (See sample scenario below.)
  2. Naughty School Girl is sent to the Principal’s office for some discipline.
  3. Playful Maid cleans up for the lonely bachelor.
  4. Officer pulls over the suspect who will do anything to avoid jail.
  5. Naughty Nurse checks on the patient. (See sample scenario below.)
  6. Want-to-be Porn Star goes for her interview and has to show her skills.
  7. Birthday Boy/Girl visits a strip club and gets more than a lap dance for his/her birthday.
  8. The Lonely Widow calls a giggalo to come and service her.
  9. Best Friend shows up for an uninvited visit and catches the other friend in the act of masturbating.
  10.  The Curious Shopper shows up at the sex shop and gets some hands on toy demonstrations.
  11. The Desperate Woman shows up for her job interview.
  12. Wrestlers have a bet that whoever wins the match gets what they want from their rival .
  13.  The Inmate seduces the Prison Guard.
  14. The Sexy Caretaker meets all of her patient’s needs.
  15. Strangers meet at a bar and have more than drinks.
  16. A “John” picks up a prostitute for some naughty fun.
  17. The Plumber does more for the woman of the house than fix her sink.
  18.  You just got a package delivered and it’s your new SexBot. The SexBot is programmed to follow your every command.
  19. The Hotel Guest calls the manager and requests a bath be drawn for them.
  20. The Overly Obsessed Stalker kidnaps their victim and ties them down in the basement.
  21. Steward/Stewardess and lucky flight passenger join the Mile High Club. (see below)
  22. Futuristic person finds an obsolete cryogenic tube with a surprise inside.
  23. Cowboys and Indians grown ups edition!
  24. Boss gives employee a tip to the top.
  25. Mr. Fire Hose has to put a little extra back into putting out the fire.
  26. Act out your favorite movie couple.
  27. Tenant pays the rent or gets the shaft. (see below)


If you are new to role playing and not quite sure where to start, check out these 6 sexy role playing scenarios for couples from Bedroomroleplay.com

  1.  Lonely Redeye Flight: The Flight Attendant Gives Commentary Service to the Handsome Passenger
  2. Risk of Eviction:Desperate Tenant Convinces Property Manager Not to Kick Her Out
  3. Relaxing Massage: The Masseur Gives A Sensual Message To The Tense Woman
  4. Surprise Wake Up: The Patient Wakes Up To A Naughty Nurse
  5. Private Lap Dance: The Stripper Breaks Her Own Rules in the VIP Room During The Private Lap Dance
  6. Doctors On Call: The Stressed MDs Comfort Each Other During A Long Shift

I personally have tried most of these scenarios. #2 and #5 are also fun with the gender roles reversed.



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Grapefruit Blow Job

I’ll admit that this particular technique took a while to catch my interest; but when it did, I was thoroughly surprised by it. I am not a grapefruit fan as far as taste it is bitter and not very appealing, but it is a fantastic bedroom edible! The technique was posted in a video some time ago on YouTube and I’ve dropped it in here below as well.

If you can stop laughing at the ridiculous noises and have the urge for a special guest in your oral explorations, this can be fun for both participants. Below I’ll list some items I’ve found useful during the Grapefruit Technique.

Here’s what you’ll need

  1. A grapefruit. (I can usually get two middle slices out of a good sized grapefruit… but this is a necessary ingredient)
  2. A knife. (Whatever you usually use to cut fruit)
  3. A towel. (This method is very messy and even with the towel you may be washing the sheets after this method.)

In my experiences with this method the male recipient is not one bit upset about the grapefruit. There was no burning sensation as the video warns about, and given enough prep time the grapefruit should not be uncomfortably cold. This doesn’t therefore mean that all experiences are the same, so be alert for the recipient’s tells. If it is uncomfortable for the recipient then the experience could be less desirable for you.

stick figures doing dirty shit - YouTube

The user, in my case me, gets to have a lot of fun as well. The technique, although thoroughly messy, is very tasty and provides a heightened experience for both. If like me you usually wind up using your hands toward the end of a blow job, this technique allows you to incorporate your hands at all times and the grapefruit encourages me to keep using my mouth as well. I couldn’t believe how much I enjoyed the taste of the grapefruit myself.

In short, the Grapefruit Technique is my favorite oral technique to use when I don’t mind a little after party clean-up. Even without enjoying a grapefruit as the fruit itself, adding the bitterly sour fruit to the bedroom is a fantastic way to spice up your love life regardless of how much or little sex you and your partner have. Remember to be mindful of the cleanup process and prep for this technique, as well as the possibility of moderate discomfort to the recipient. As for me, this method has no drawbacks of discomfort and only a slight misstep in cleanliness.

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Fruit Roll-Up Blow Job

I first heard about the idea of using a Fruit Roll-Up during a blow job from a friend at work, and why not? I am sure we all remember Fruit Roll-Ups being a tasty fruity snack as a kid, but incorporating them into the bedroom was a whole new concept for me. I had to try this.

What you need

  1. Fruit Roll-Ups
  2. That’s It!

It’s very simple, just take a Fruit Roll-Up and wrap it around the penis before giving oral. I wrap the Fruit Roll-Up around the shaft of the penis first and then mold the top pieces over the head; but, you could also tear into strips if you wanted to. There really is no wrong way to do this!

After the first time I was hooked and often keep a box of Fruit Roll-Ups bedside. For one, they are great tasting and come in lots of flavors. I mean there is nothing wrong with the taste of a penis, but there really is no taste to a penis. The flavor will also help those who might not care for the taste of ejaculate in their mouths.

Secondly, the stickiness of the Fruit Roll-Up means no hands. If you’re anything like me you may tend to get lazy while giving head, everything starts off well and then you tend to start using your hand instead. I mean, let’s be real sometimes giving a blow job is like work; hence the name job. Since the Fruit Roll-Up will adhere to the skin when moistened you have to really suck hard to get all of it off of the penis, and it is so sticky you are more likely not to use your hands.

In conclusion, the Fruit Roll-Up is quite possibly one of my favorite inexpensive additives to the bedroom. If you plan to use this method just realize it is a bit messy because of the stickiness, and also buying these fruit snacks means you’ll have to hide them from the kids, or they will eat them before they get to their intended purpose!



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